The wake—Closure for Cam's family and friends

 By Steve Otto

I had a wake for Cam last night. We had delayed having it due to the Covid crises and bad weather. Mostly members of her family came, including her brothers, and one of mine, and some good friends. It was a casual affair in Linda Stoners back yard. Some of us went to Kirby's later in the evening.  We had some ham sandwiches and we had some crackers, cheese and snacks. It was a potluck and bring your own drinks. Some folks brought whisky and beer and the rest of us (yes—I'm including, me. I'm cutting down and drinking, just about quitting).[1] The rest of us drank soft drinks, tea or, as in the case of me and probably only me, fake (non-alcoholic) beer.

On Cam's side, her brothers, Fred, Clint and Brian Gentry drove down from Lawrence to be here. Her sisters presently live in Florida and couldn't come.  On my side of the family, Ethan Otto, her stepson was there. Also my brother Phil Otto and his wife Sheryl, and most of their siblings came, including Brandi Lazar, Josh Lazar, Elizabeth Lazar and Jenny Davis and her children Caden, Nolan and Emma.

We also had some friends come, including Linda's husband Michael Stoner, their daughter Shelly Stoner, Roger and Mary Peach and John Mesh.

I've probably left some one's name out, but this is just a light article, nothing more.

It was an informal affair, but it brought closure to me and the guests and I feel like Cam has now had an official funeral. Since the two of us were not religious, the event went well with our theme of atheism or agnosticism. I posted some of my favorite death quotes, meant to be up-lifting and passed them around. After reading them over, after the event, I noticed I may have missed the mark on being up-lifting. Some of them were kind of un-impressive and a bit negative. But no one complained, even though there were some religious folks there.

Here are some photos:

 

Here are the quotes (minus the Mao Zedong quote because I used it before in an earlier article):

 

"No More Games. No More Bombs. No More Walking. No More Fun. No More Swimming. 67. That is 17 years past 50. 17 more than I needed or wanted. Boring. I am always bitchy. No Fun - for anybody. 67. You are getting Greedy. Act your old age. Relax - This won't hurt." - Hunter S. Thompson,  -Hunter S. Thompson's last words[2]

 

Since men must dread eternal pains in death.
For what the soul may be they do not know,
Whether 'tis born, or enter in at birth,
And whether, snatched by death, it die with us,
Or visit the shadows and the vasty caves
Of Orcus, or by some divine decree
Enter the brute herds, as our Ennius sang,
Who first from lovely Helicon brought down
A laurel wreath of bright perennial leaves,
Renowned forever among the Italian clans. -Titus Lucretius Carus

 

"Nothing exists except atoms and empty space; everything else is opinion." -Democritus (Δημόκριτος)

"Hot pitch, executioners, torture, and all those ghastly diversions the judges impose on felons scare us and let us imagine an eternity of whips, firebrands, and scourges, the effect of which is to make life on this earth a hell for those fools who cannot distinguish dreams from the truth.” - Lucretius 

 

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[1] And yes, although I've written about my criticism of the 12 step programs, such as AA, I am trying to quit drinking. And yes I'm trying to be "California Sober."

[2] https://www.phrases.org.uk/famous-last-words/hunter-s-thompson.